Unfortunately, many people suffer from perfectionism which is the desire to appear and be perfect. Perfectionism can be dangerous because it can lead to impossibly high standards and excessive self-criticism. It can also cause you to become overly critical of others as well.
The bottom line is that there is no such things as perfection! No one can possibly do everything right all the time, and you, my dear, are no exception.
You might be suffering from perfectionism if you find yourself falling into all or nothing thinking. For example, you either win or you lose in a situation, or something’s great or terrible in terms of its outcome. You might also be a perfectionist if you are constantly afraid of not meeting goals or if you often have very unrealistic expectations and standards.
Perfectionism typically stems from a fear of judgement, low self esteem, or an underlying mental health condition. If can be more prevalent for women than for men.
If you recognize this type of behavior in yourself, there are some things that you can do to overcome perfectionism including the following:
- Practice Positive Self-Talk. Perfectionists tend to beat themselves up. Remember to be kind and gentle when thinking or talking about yourself. You must be your biggest cheerleader, not your worst critic.
- Become more mindful of your thoughts and feelings. Start to notice when you are engaging in perfectionist thinking or behaviors. Give yourself a gentle nudge in the other direction when you spot it.
- Work on acceptance. Try to embrace things as they are, not how you want them to be. It’s good be a high achiever but remind yourself that it takes a lot of time and effort to achieve success.
- Spend time with those who support you (and aren’t critical of you). If you surround yourself with people who support and accept you are you are, you’ll begin to understand that anything less than perfect is okay.
- Remind yourself that your best is enough. No one can ever be perfect even if they come close at times. Remember that your best is enough and that you’ll continue to improve with experience.
- Focus on the positive in all situations. There is always a silver lining even when things go wrong. Fight your perfectionistic tendencies by finding it and clinging to it with everything you’ve got.
- Create a mantra about your value and self-worth. It could be that low self-worth is fueling your need for perfection. Coming up with a mantra to boost your confidence can really help you out!
- Get better at dealing with criticism or setbacks. Remind yourself that criticism and setbacks are gifts from the universe. They give you clues about what you need to do to improve! Unwrap them with care.